You’ve finally gotten that caption, post, course, or new program offering done.
It’s typed up, ready to go, and it’s perfect. It conveys your mission, message, and personality to a tee. And you just know that your target audience is going to L-O-V-E it.
But as your finger goes to tap post, you freeze. Through all the excitement comes a tiny voice, but you can’t quite make out what it’s saying.
You pause and listen closer, and the voice gets louder, more pronounced.
And as it gets louder, you can make out the words. It’s saying things like “I can’t do this. No one will like it. Who am I to think that I can make money or grow a following or, or or…”.
And just like that, you remove your finger. You close out of the screen, and yet another chance to step into your truth and embrace your purpose floats away.
That voice? That terrible, nagging, self-doubt causing voice? That’s imposter syndrome. And it’s got a way of putting down even the most successful entrepreneurs.
But it doesn’t have to!
And today I want to take you through 3 easy ways to tackle imposter syndrome and build confidence in yourself, your business, and your brand.
The first step to solving any good problem is to come up with an overarching solution.
And the solution to imposter syndrome is confidence!
Now, I view confidence and self-love as pretty interconnected, and I even have a whole post all about how self-love is incredibly important for entrepreneurs.
But here’s a summary for you on-the-go gals: self-love is the key to success because it negates negativity, helps us overcome obstacles, and gives us the ability to believe in our skills, talents, and abilities.
Self-love is the ability to say “I am worthy, right here, right now. And I am also worthy, no matter what has happened in my past or will happen in my future.”
Self-love allows us to build confidence in ourselves, and confidence is what we can use to fight imposter syndrome!
Speaking of that sneaky devil, imposter syndrome is basically saying “I am not worthy, not now, not ever.”
It’s a belief that we somehow are “other”, an outsider to whatever we are trying to achieve. It’s a fear that we don’t belong, and it’s the exact opposite of self-love.
That’s why we fight imposter syndrome with confidence. They are the exact opposite of one another, and when we can overshadow imposter syndrome with our own confidence, then we’ve got a winning combination!
Now a note here, because I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. Just like many things in our world, imposter syndrome and confidence exist on a scale.
Some days we may be 99% confident and imposter syndrome may feel like a far off, mystical idea. I live for these days!
Some days we may be 51% confident, and feel like we are fighting to ward off the 49% imposter syndrome from taking over the majority.
The goal here isn’t to eradicate imposter syndrome; it’s to give ourselves the tools to build more confidence, so the self-doubt doesn’t seem as loud and overwhelming.
Cool? Then let’s get started!
Hug, Haggle, and Align: A 3 Step Method to Building Confidence (+ beating imposter syndrome)
So, there’s an easy, 3 step method that you can use to build up your confidence; I call it the hug, haggle, and align method (and yes, I am upset that I couldn’t think of a synonym for align that starts with the letter “h”).
Step One: Embrace Your Strengths
Here’s where we hug it out, with ourselves. The first step to tackling self-doubt and building confidence is to hone in on what makes us great!
One of the biggest pieces of fuel for the self-doubt fire is all the things that we think we can’t do.
“I can’t grow my following. I can’t make that sale. I can’t look the way she does in her styled photoshoots.”
When we focus on all of the things that we cannot do, don’t have experience in, or just haven’t done yet, we perpetuate the feeling of self-doubt until it becomes full-blown imposter syndrome.
That’s why we need to flip the script (and the negative thoughts in our head) and embrace the things that we *can* do.
What does this look like? It’s a process that we can call “uncovering your superpowers”, and it involves taking a look at the things that you love to do and are really good at.
Even though you struggle to use video in your marketing, maybe you’re a wizard when it comes to SEO.
Or maybe you’re not so great at pitching your own products to your audience, but you’re a rockstar at pitching to brands.
Sometimes it can be hard for people to figure out their strengths, especially when we are so in the weeds of our own minds.
That’s when the power of feedback comes in!
Ask your audience or past clients what they thought your strengths are. Ask your best friend, ask your mom.
Or even think back to the feedback you got on report cards as a kid. Mine would say things like “a pleasure to have in class” or “a friend to all”, which now supports the kind of work I do know (empowering female creatives by being friendly, supportive, and offering real talk advice).
Come up with a few strengths, write them out, and celebrate them 🎉
Step Two: Get Real About Your Goals
Now that you’ve toasted to yourself (hopefully with a nice glass of wine!), it’s time to get down into the haggling.
I want you to get real about your goals. Like, really real.
I want to start off by saying that I don’t think you should stop dreaming big. Absolutely not, girl! Dream as big as you possibly can!
But what I am saying is that I want to you take a good hard look at your goals and ask yourself if they truly align with 1. What you want and 2. What your strengths are?
Or are they goals they you set because everyone else was doing them? Are they goals they you set because that’s the path that someone you admire took?
Are they goals that you set because it felt like what you should be doing, not actually what you want to do?
I’m asking you to do this because this is where a lot of self-doubt comes from – from trying to do something that isn’t right for you. You’re trying to fit a puzzle piece into the wrong puzzle. You’re shaving down your edges, turning yourself around trying to fit into a design that wasn’t meant for you.
But girl, it’s ok for you to stand out.
So reassess those goals. And remember, it might not be a matter of scratching them all together. You can simply rewrite them!
Step Three: Make It All Align
Alright girl, we made it to the final step!
We’ve updated our goals to match our strengths, but now it’s time to put it all into action!
For many people (myself included!) this can be the hardest part. It’s one thing to decide to change your mindset or how you measure success. It’s a totally different thing to show up, unapologetically as yourself in all areas of your business.
But you’re in luck, because I’ve summed up how to make sure you are in alignment into one easy question: “Am I hugging, or am I haggling?”
Yup, we’re bringing it full circle!
When you’re feeling self-doubt, when you’re struggling with how to show up authentically online or how to promote a product, ask yourself this question.
Am I hugging myself right now? Am I embracing my strengths, my passions, and what I truly want to do?
Or am I haggling with myself? Am I trying to change little pieces of myself and my business to fit into some mold that’s been determined by someone else?
If you answered hugging, well then you’re golden! Pass go, collect $200! 😉
If you answered haggling, then remember the exercise we did earlier. Dive into what’s holding you back from showing up to your business as yourself.
Because I don’t know if anyone told you lately, but you should never have to haggle with yourself. You are wonderful, talented, and amazing, as you are right now.
So allow yourself to drop the haggling. Drop the self-doubt and imposter syndrome, and step out into the world, completely as you are.
Because she, well she deserves all the success that she can find.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
I’m Asha, the girl behind Adventures with Asha! I empower growing female creatives to connect with themselves and other entrepreneurs by providing personal and professional development, real talk advice, and community building opportunities.
Through virtual events and honesty and vulnerability on social media, I help them step up, show up, and shine in their biz. But I don’t just mic drop knowledge. I nourish growth, foster sisterhood and relationships, and support female creatives through the whole process of being a badass. Because even badasses need a sidekick!
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